In the ever-evolving saga of Elon Musk’s public and private life, few have managed to lampoon the tech titan quite like late-night host Jimmy Kimmel, whose recent monologue pulled no punches. This time, Kimmel didn’t just roast Musk for his business moves or controversial tweets — he targeted the billionaire’s ever-expanding brood and painted a comical picture that had the internet in stitches: Elon Musk as a “kangaroo dad,” possibly carrying his babies in a pouch.

The punchline came during a segment that dissected a bombshell report from The Wall Street Journal, which accused Musk of using his own social media platform, X, to recruit women to bear his children. The report detailed how Musk allegedly fathers children through private messages, promises of wealth, and strict non-disclosure agreements.

According to sources and text messages reviewed by WSJ, the billionaire has already fathered at least 14 children with four different women — and possibly more.

For Kimmel, this wasn’t just a story — it was comedy gold.

Showing a now-viral photo of Musk shirtless at the beach, the host launched into one of the most outrageous analogies of the night: “Based on this photograph, he may have given birth to them, too. He’s probably carrying a few around in his pouch like a kangaroo.”

The audience roared, but the joke struck deeper than just physical comedy. It highlighted the absurd scale and secrecy of Musk’s parenting, as well as his disjointed presence in the lives of many of his children. While Musk proclaims to be saving humanity from population collapse, critics point out that he’s often emotionally and physically absent from the very children he brings into the world.

Kimmel continued the segment by recounting details from the WSJ article, which described Musk’s so-called “baby legion” — a growing network of children he allegedly fathers with women handpicked from social media. The comedian joked about Musk’s text messages sounding like a comic-book villain, especially one line in which Musk reportedly wrote:“To reach legion-level before the apocalypse, we will need to use surrogates.”

Kimmel’s response? “He even texts like a supervillain. He’s not Elon Musk anymore — he’s Sex Luther.”

The combination of “Sex Luther” and “Kangaroo Dad” created an instant meme storm online, but the underlying commentary was clear. Kimmel wasn’t just mocking Musk for laughs — he was holding up a mirror to a public figure whose private ambitions are starting to sound like a dystopian plotline.

According to the WSJ, Musk has allegedly offered some of these women millions in hush money, proposing deals where he would fund their lifestyles in exchange for silence and legal compliance. Women like Ashley St. Clair, who gave birth to a child she says was fathered by Musk, claimed she was offered $15 million and $100,000 a month — but only if she never spoke publicly about their relationship or the baby.

St. Clair refused to sign the NDA and has since gone public with her story, sparking widespread backlash and a renewed debate about Musk’s ethics, not just in tech, but in fatherhood. Kimmel seized on the surreal nature of the revelations, equating Musk’s actions to something between a Marvel villain and a fertility cult leader.

He also poked fun at Musk’s belief that declining birth rates are the biggest threat to civilization, an idea Musk has repeated often on X and at global conferences. While many demographers acknowledge a slowdown in population growth in certain regions, Kimmel was less convinced.

“I don’t know what planet Elon lives on,” he said. “This one seems full to me. Ever try getting out of the parking lot at Dodger Stadium? We’re good on people.”

The kangaroo comparison was just one part of a broader point: Musk’s obsession with reproducing isn’t just personal — it’s strategic, grandiose, and deeply weird. In Musk’s own words, he sees himself as a warrior against demographic doom. In Kimmel’s monologue, he’s the world’s richest mammal… quietly incubating future billionaires in his pouch.

Behind the satire, the realities are more sobering. The WSJ report painted Musk’s parenting model as one built on distance, legal structure, and financial leverage, rather than emotional connection or co-parenting. Many of his partners reportedly live in homes arranged by Musk’s fixer, Jared Birchall, and are required to sign confidentiality agreements to secure continued support.

Kimmel’s “Kangaroo Dad” analogy became an instant cultural shorthand for this strange and secretive empire — a man who might not be changing diapers, but could be harboring offspring like they’re backup hard drives. The image is absurd, but in a world where billionaires have the power to fund governments, launch rockets, and now engineer families in private, it’s also unsettlingly plausible.

As the segment wrapped up, Kimmel added one last line that merged cynicism with deadpan wit: “It is kind of sweet, I guess. Elon loves babies. I mean, he spent $300 million to get one elected president.”

The audience laughed again — not just at the joke, but at the surreal reality of a man whose life seems increasingly detached from the norms most people live by. From buying Twitter to building a child army, from Neuralink to name-gagging his own children (remember X Æ A-12?), Elon Musk is no longer just the world’s richest man — he’s becoming the world’s weirdest dad.

And as Jimmy Kimmel made abundantly clear, if Musk really is a kangaroo, he’s the only one whose pouch comes with a legal department and a nondisclosure clause.