‘Another Netflix film made to half-watch whilst doing laundry’.

Poor, poor Jennifer Lopez – she just can’t catch a break. This last week she had to cancel her tour due to poor sales, and whilst she sits comfortably at the top spot on Netflix with her latest starring role in Atlas – it’s also had some of the worst reviews for a major 2024 film and only comes a few weeks after her completely bewildering This Is Me Now: A Love Story. We’re all starting to think that her acclaim in Hustlers that nearly saw her nominated for an Academy Award was merely a fluke – because the reviews for Atlas are truly terrible. Here’s a rundown of the most savage reviews of Atlas on Netflix, whilst I imagine JLo reads then laughs all the way to the bank.

‘Jarringly ugly’ – The Guardian

The Guardian film reviews are never one to mince words, and in the savage review of Atlas on Netflix the publication dragged the film’s visuals saying “Visually, we often understand where the reported budget of $100m has gone (it’s Netflix’s biggest female-fronted film to date), with some grand, if choppily edited, action sequences – but more often it proves far harder, with an unimaginative vision of the future that can look genuinely, jarringly ugly both on Earth and in space, much of the film resembling a tinny old video game.”

The Guardian also writes that the film brings out Jo’s “worst, soapiest instincts” in regards to her acting, and calls Hustlers JLo’s only great AND only decent film in the last 20 years. Lol.

‘Generic dialogue’ – The Wrap

In a brutal takedown of Atlas, William Bibbiani from The Wrap savagely penned “Hidden somewhere beneath all the generic dialogue, embarrassing plot, mediocre action and oddly ineffective performances, there’s a good idea in Brad Peyton’s Atlas. It’s a shame the filmmakers never found it.”

Variety called it unoriginal

The publication basically said JLo had to just handle the film on her own, left to drown in its own nonsense, saying Atlas’ “dearth of original ideas that undercuts the appeal of Atlas, leaving Lopez to fend for herself in much the same way her character is forced to in the film’s formulaic story.”

The Hollywood Reporter had the best and most savage one liner, though

In a truly damning statement that has me chuckling into my coffee, The Hollywood Reporter brutally said “another Netflix film made to half-watch whilst doing laundry”. What a line.