Prince Harry said one specific row made him rethink his attitudes and take action to improve his mental health.
In his memoir Spare, Prince Harry reflected on a disagreement with his wife Meghan Markle that led him to seek therapy, as he recalled “snapping” at her.
The Duke of Sussex said it was this specific row that made him rethink his attitudes and take action to improve his mental health after he let his anger get the better of him.
He wrote: “Maybe the wine went to my head. Maybe the weeks of battling the press had worn me down. For some reason, when the conversation took an unexpected turn, I became touchy. Then angry. Disproportionately, sloppily angry.”
Harry claimed that he had interpreted something that Meghan had said “in the wrong way” due to their cultural differences and an apparent language barrier.
He added: “I was also just over-sensitive that night. I thought: ‘Why’s she having a go at me?’ I snapped at her, spoke to her harshly [and] cruelly.
Prince Harry’s fight with Meghan Markle led him to reflect on his mental health
“As the words left my mouth, I could feel everything in the room come to a stop. The gravy stopped bubbling, the molecules of air stopped orbiting. Even Nina Simone seemed to pause.”
After this row Meghan left the room for a “full 15 minutes”, with Harry then finding her in their bedroom where his wife asked what had prompted him to act in this way.
He recalled in Spare: “She was calm, but said in a quiet, level tone that she would never stand for being spoken to like that. I nodded. She wanted to know where it came from.
The couple wed in May 2018
“[She asked,] ‘Where did you ever hear a man speak like that to a woman? Did you overhear adults speak that way when you were growing up?’ I cleared my throat, looked away [and responded], ‘Yes.'”
Harry then said how Meghan explained to him that she would not “raise children in an atmosphere of anger or disrespect” and encouraged him to examine what he had normalised as a child.
They agreed that he should go to therapy, as Harry wrote: “It came from somewhere deep inside, somewhere that needed to be excavated, and it was obvious that I could use some help with the job.”
William initially told Harry to try therapy first
The Duke admitted that he had previously tried therapy, after his older brother Prince William encouraged him to go, however he believed it had not worked.
Meghan insisted that he keep trying, with Harry now speaking openly about how his mental health was impacted by his upbringing.
He also claimed that William had once made fun of his anxiety, as he detailed in Spare: “I was an agoraphobe. Which was nearly impossible given my public role.
“After one speech, which couldn’t be avoided or cancelled, and during which I’d nearly fainted, Willy came up to me backstage. Laughing.”