“Did you overhear adults speak that way when you were growing up?”

Prince Harry and Meghan Markle appeared to have a fairytale courtship and royal wedding. However, the prince opened up about some of the couple’s more challenging moments in his biography, Spare, including an argument they had early on in their relationship.

Meghan was introduced to Prince Harry in July 2016, and the couple’s romance moved rather quickly. In his book, Harry described a date the couple had in December 2016, during which they roasted a chicken while drinking wine and listening to James Taylor and Nina Simone. However, the night turned sour when the prince “snapped” at his future wife, seemingly for no reason.

“Maybe the wine went to my head,” Harry explained in Spare (via the Express). “Maybe the weeks of battling the press had worn me down.” He continued, “For some reason, when the conversation took an unexpected turn, I became touchy. Then angry. Disproportionately, sloppily angry.”

Unfortunately, communication between the couple broke down. “Meg said something I took the wrong way,” Harry wrote. “It was partly a cultural difference, partly a language barrier, but I was also just over-sensitive that night. I thought: Why’s she having a go at me? I snapped at her, spoke to her harshly, cruelly.”

Harry realized he’d behaved badly as Meghan left the room for fifteen minutes, and didn’t return. When he finally went to find her, she was sitting on the bed, and told him, “[I] would never stand for being spoken to like that.” The Duchess of Sussex then tried to ascertain where Harry’s anger had come from, and why he’d reacted the way he did. “Where did you ever hear a man speak like that to a woman?” she asked him. “Did you overhear adults speak that way when you were growing up?’ I cleared my throat, looked away. Yes.”

Meghan was apparently firm with Harry, telling him, “She wasn’t going to tolerate that kind of partner. Or co-parent. That kind of life. She wasn’t going to raise children in an atmosphere of anger or disrespect.”

According to Harry, he entered therapy after their disagreement, with a view to working on the anger he felt. “It came from somewhere deep inside, somewhere that needed to be excavated, and it was obvious that I could use some help with the job,” he wrote. The couple have since married, welcomed two children, and started a new life together in California. Plus, Harry has continued to advocate for the benefits of therapy, and it presumably changed his life for the better.